Ten Story Love

Guitarist jokes

  • Q: How can you tell a guitarist is at your door?
    A: By the Dominos Pizza hat.
  • Q: What do a guitar solo and premature ejaculation have in common?
    A: You know it's coming and there's nothing you can do about it.
  • Q: How do you get two guitar players to play in perfect unision?
    A: Shoot One.
  • Q: What would a guitarist do if he won a million dollars?
    A: Continue to play gigs until the money ran out.
  • Q: How do you get a guitarist to turn down?
    A: Put some sheet music in front of him.
  • Q: What do an electric guitarist and a vacuum cleaner have in common?
    A: When you plug them in, they both suck.
  • Q: How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
    A: None-- they just steal someone else's light.
    Alternate Answer: 5-- One to change the bulb and 4 do watch him and say "I can do better than that."
    Alternate Answer: Only one-- but he'll go though a whole box of bulbs before he finds just the right one.
  • Q: In the 22nd Century, how many guitarists will it take to change a light source?
    A: 5-- One to do it and 4 to reminisce about how much better the old tubes were.
  • Q: How does a Lead Guitarist change a lightbulb?
    A: He holds it and the world revolves around him.
  • Q: What's the difference between a fiddle & a violin?
    A: Who cares - neither one's a guitar!
  • Q: What's the difference between a Lead Guitarist and the PLO?
    A: You can negotiate with the PLO.
  • Q: Did you hear about the guitarist who was in tune?
    A: Neither have I.
  • Q: Why do musicians have to be awake by six o'clock?
    A: Because most shops close by six thirty.
  • Q: Why are so many guitar player jokes one liners?
    A: So the rest of the band can understand them.
  • Q: What's black and blue and laying in a ditch?
    A: A guitarist who's told too many drummer jokes.
  • 2 guys were walking down the street. One was destitute.
    The other was a guitarist as well.
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